france is calling me...again

this is a sentence from a woymn at her blog.. We have this thing that takes place all thru out the summer and fall here in providence called waterfire. it is fire on the canal, gondolas, and the most amazing and haunting music plays all around you, from classical, to dead can dance, opera, Tibetan, baroque and many others. you will find an array of food vendors such as indian, raw bar, creperie, nut vendors and ice cream. Different street performers like fire eaters,gargoyles, chinese dancers, jewish folk fiddlers and so on. The most incredible dance stage draped in red velvet curtains that feature, Argentinean salsa band one night, big band the next. people of all ages and levels come out to dance and you can easily get lost staring at the them...people walk, sit stare and listen...tonight was a small one so no stage, but i felt like walking it was such a beautiful fall night. i took photographs but i am afraid they were not the best, i hope you get get a sense of what ii's like!! I will get her address later...her photographs are romatic, mystic, soft, illusive...lov them--this photo is from her site....yummy for sure...i want to go there. I did not know it was Providence, RI....how funny...my heart was in France for sure...oh well, I can go to both places....liberation allows those choices!

the beginning is almost here

went to the office to get ready for "tomorrow when our BSW program starts with REAL STUDENTS"---I really can't get over the idea that a new undergraduate program is going to start with real students tomorrow...what a thrill...nervous, excited, questioning, no answers, support, cheerful people all around, many motivated students, supportive faculty, wonderful staff and friends...so here we go PSU...come on students it will be wonderful and I can't wait to meet all of you sometime this week...you go girl! congrats c. thank you to all made this possible!

the river looked like ice today

just love looking at our river....fall is beautiful here too. just household stuff all day...cleaning, washing, shopping, recycle, goodwill, etc etc.....taking out summer clothes and replacing with winter clothes...just the cycle of life....afterwards pretty tired and flat on my back napping...now i am awake..."Raindrops falling on my head..." "Sundance Kid"...we will miss you Paul. What a human being. When I saw his face on his salad dressing at Safeway it almost made me cry. What a guy. Thank you hp for his presence on earth....we will miss you. Pictures from yesterday at the quilt show with l and j...i love the textures, colors, creativity, "the grand canyon", and a cat that looks like it is ready to catch me! nite nite

quilts of awe land

so many quilts and not enough time...i took many pictures but can't seem to figure out how to sync with my i-phone...pretty good day. GOT MY GLASSES FIXED. A nice young man came by my apartment and worked on my computer and got most of my problems fixed...in the world of the computer that is. going to purchase a wireless modem tomorrow so i can get internet on my new macpro...got my backup drive working...so he was very good and not expensive at all...i gave him an extra big tip....!!! now i have someone to call who will come over and make a house visit for my computer woos. lots of house/home stuff for tomorrow...shopping, cleaning, etc. etc...my plan with f did not go too well this week...if my plan with f is scored my score was 3 and it was 10...i lost. thanks to l for inviting me to see the quilts in north Portland...j is fun to be around too. the statue is of a "stereotypical Indian" in Paris...the Lakota hollywood gets around does he?

the students are coming

l sent me the link for this picture---what does her pose say to you? This picture is not about our students at all...just wanted to share it with you. Yes, our students will be all arriving (or we hope) next week; met several more last night at our last orientation...some very active students...it will be a wonderful quarter...I can see my role as a "mother" but I don't want to be called "The Mother"; if you know what I mean...oh well...starting a new relationship with 40 students (we hope so); we don't have all the numbers yet and as m said to me: "we can't make them come"...that is true...still need to work on my class for next week. this is a team! it will be what it will be...it will happen...it is happening...

ok here we go

counting points and walking today....nice to have some control now...some limits on my own behavior...waited too long for dinner but did not do damage when I got home...need to shop tomorrow so this will not happen...at meetings all day tomorrow..so, charchar you can do this..you will feel better, my dear one.

love & hate relationship

i am here again...my relationship with food...it has captured me again, with my consent, of course. so, i will start another relationship after i have dinner...the true addict comment... afterwards....yes, i am addicted to food. it will fill me up, my losses, my saddness, my grief, my my me me me...yes, the hole in my spirit. Today the sermon was outstanding....all the different people who have lived on earth have given us over and over again the message of truth...we are love, when i love myself that is my spirit presenting itself through my flesh...as Marilyn said a few weeks ago...well my flesh is large and there is lots of cells to give love; i have to love myself with that same sense as i love others....go within, char. yes, you have had great loss but that is the truth and it will not change no matter how many "food items" you eat....it is a place I have been so many times in my life so i guess i still need to learn my lesson and accept myself with love with love toward myself...saying no will not hurt anyone and it will give you life. just did lots of art...messy...watched the river with raindrops and then later the rainbow over the bridge....earlier today i went to the "Race for the Cure" at the waterfront downtown...45,000 people walking, running, rolling, crying, laughing, playing...it was the first one i had been to. i did not walk in it but wanted to see it and i did. it is a goal for next year...for me to walk toward...walk toward my own health. thank you for s who overcame her cancer in her arm, bless all the people who live on the hopi and navajo reservartion who have had breast and cervical cancer, both those who have gone to the other world and those who are will us today..love to l who had suffering in her voice earlier today. love to uu, psu, our new students, the new faculty, the new life, and all the change of seasons...lov to those who are in flag, l2 and so many more people i miss. many new doors to open and close.

Julio in NY

First, the "Believe" quote is from Obama...and the other azul gato is from a new site L told me about "gennies"...I was visiting interesting sites tonight and came across an NPR story with a social worker from NYC, age 31...Julio Diaz...who was interviewed for their stories for their folklore project. The interveiw made me cry....he was a student of mine at NAU. We actually did not have a very good relationship at that time but I am so proud of him and his character, honor, truth, friendship with others, and ability to hear with his heart and act with his words. the link is "A victim treats his mugger right" at NPR. I also gave my dear friend l1 a book about "oscar" and I decided to learn more about the author, Juniou Diaz whose name I actually put into google and the story about our Julio came up as the first "hit"...NPR has a really profound interview with the author Julio Diaz about his book. I want to use it for my Diversity and Social Justice class...or read from it anyway...it touched my heart. Now I want to buy the book for myself...the interveiw was at iturnes under podcasts...what a machine the internet is...our circle within circles...we need these connections so badily. I had a great day with my friends at the PSU picnic...I have been laughing more each day...I am getting to be more like my "ole self" as my friend Ali said this morning from Olympia...laughter is food for my soul...good nite

unreal

just basically running from one meeting to the next...and the next...and the next..nite

What A Week This Has Been...

doors are always opening...if we keep our eyes open to new opportunities; went to the coast, Oceanside...Cannon Beach...drove up and down the coast...had a retreat with XXXX from psu....walked on beach, talked into the night with new friends; got locked out of my apartment door; had dinner with two new friends; working in my journal with a new Bigpicturescrapbook mini art workshop...happy to be a live and hope c is feeling better; had a long conversation with a...feeling better these days...leg not hurting as much; walked from downtown at lunch today...really hot outside; nice visit with l. hope she is feeling better. well off to bed so nite nite...see u later or earlier as the case may be at this time of night...

Belmont Street Fair

up at 5:30 am and walked on the waterfront for about 40 minutes...finally got sleepy and went home and slept. Then did my laundry at a place I found a couple weeks ago and I feel safe there to do it myself--lots of room, clean, owned by a nice couple who speak in a language I don't understand; *she runs the place--just can tell with the tone of her voice+..anyway continued to read bo book...amazing story. then off to drive around...ended up on Belmont Road and a street fair...had a blast seeing all the fun stuff, many people, hot, just fun! had lunch...heard drums from Guana...then came back to my little "hogan" and went to the waterfront again and saw the last of the dragon boat races...what a great place to live; I am feeling better. my dear friend, b called from Flag lots to talk about...miss her. so off to Oceanside tomorrow for a PSU retreat starting Monday so we can play tomorrow. Need to pack early am...playing on the web and working on my new art journal...just having fun...yea, I might even smile soon!!!!! no internet or cell phone at the condo from Sun to Tuesday..that will be interesting...oh well...good nite l, h, and d. and of course your cute 2 cats and 2 dogs....lov you all. (saw this painting at Amanda Blake's web site art...it is called Charlotte something...love the image with the horse...thanks for the site referral L.

This Planet is In Bad Shape

It is unreal...I think sp is "an empress with no clothes"..this is not meant to be sexist but an analogy from a children's story...she is empty but everyone thinks she is full.(I think she is "full of it") The pix are of the city hall where she was first elected with 907 votes. Aren't we lucky.This town is 12 miles by 11 miles and that equals to governing the USA??? As I said somewhere else early today. McCain picked a woman to fight his battle; I thought he was the one with the gun and went to war, but no he has to "use a woman" to do what he can't do; leave the work up to the woman. She is exactly what the r want...a flea getting lots of recognition and making enough "GAS" to take the conversation off mccain...mccain talks about "change" but he is from the party that caused all the problems...they are so messed up...they will continue to do what they have always done; be the owners of everything and make others have to pay them MORE. ...so basically it is TIME TO GET REALLY ACTIVE FOR bo. Some good news is that last night after sp talk the demos raised 10 million and the rep raised one million...we are in a civil war and they will not win. The other pix are from the governor's website; a picture of a banner of well wishes for their new baby...mixing personal and government on her web page; other pictures of her on her website...she will be able to hunt for deer in DC....good nite--unreal...actually what planet am I living on now? That is the real question.

Good Morning

Sure praying that NO will not be as bad as three years ago....I guess my theme is eggs! Aren't these pretty? From my Newport Coast trip earlier in the summer...can you believe it is ALREADY SEPTEMBER? I have been there 3 months now. I think am going on a walk now on the waterfront and then come back and work on my class. Also drink some nice hot coffee. Actually these eggs look like they have been altered with walnut ink.

How do you like these eggs?

Just spent time writing about Flag and these egges; but did not save it...so ...I was playing with photoshop tonight and decided to make a motage of egges (pix from posiegetscozy site)....had several calls from Flag tonight...nice to hear their voices....miss them.

C/B/S: Or "What is Happiness?"

L1 joined me at UU this am...what a treat...it was EXACTLY what I needed to hear for sure....no more complain; blaming; shaming...but "compassion and loving kindness"---had lunch with d,h,l then went home and had a great nap...while it rained outside. then a nice long walk on the river so for today I have 4120 steps and yesterday I had 2000. I am starting to use my pedometer and GET WITH IT. Yes, I have had loss but I also have joy with meeting new people, love from my friends, and 40 students who are looking for leadership re the new BASW program. I don't have to get back to "my ole LARGER self"...walking is something I can do and it does make me feel better; by the way, I actually cooked myself some dinner tonight! baked potato and a steak with lots left over for tomorrow or lunch next week sometime. I can cook and take care of myself...looking at all the musicals and dramas in Portland---having so many choices.

thanks to hp for friday

just don't ask me about my ordeal with the dmv....still not over with...then with wf; my level of patience is so low and now it is below any tolerance of frustration that I almost yelled today.....thank you hp for l1. she tells me the truth; whatever that is! I need to keep the door to that dark door locked! got home and started watching tv re mcc running mate...what a joke....no more shall be said by me on that topic----HOWEVER, OH MY GOODNESS; BO WAS SO WONDERFUL....what a human being he is....he is like looking into a hologram; you will see what you want and he reflects back all the positive notions of life; a man for all seasons (anger, grief, joy, calm, peace, fun, happy, shy, and a gifted oratory); if the country does not vote him in then we deserve what happens...but i am going to work for him! pray for his safety and for his family...nite nite

I am a happy camper....

Watching Biden tonight gave me some hope that maybe bo can make it...and Clinton...he delivered for him too...just love that guy...I wonder if Hilary and Bill actually can talk with each other and what do they talk about...or do they just listen to each other's presentation? their bedroom must be pretty crowded! got to give it to them for hanging in there after all that has happened...I am not sure how I got on this idea of their coupleship...went to the conference today and saw three people from northern Arizona...miss them even more now. my leg is not hurting as much today...don't say it too loud cuz I don't want it to hear this cuz it might act up tomorrow. back to psu tomorrow...tying not to bring so much home but to leave it at the office and give myself some "separation" for my work...need to really turn over a new leaf on life....so far it is only theory and no application...nite nite (this is a picture I actually took myself)..love the color.

Life in Portland

This is a quote from Rilke from aliedwards website...yes, I can identify with it..very mixed emotions lately..up and down and up and down...etc etc etc...talked with c from flag and that was good; it helped my spirits. watched the dnc tonight and that was hopeful. sure hope bo makes it...went to a birthday party for our dean, it was fun and I enjoyed getting to know more of the staff and faculty. off to the conference tomorrow...hope to see some people I know from all around the country...good nite...patience is the hardest lesson for me! Rainer Maria Rilke : Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.

Getting a taste of what it is going to feel like in a few months...shall I say? RAIN

Grey, wet, humid, cloudy, raining and I am not talking about my mood. A pre-day to get ready for the rain season. Life does not stop but everyone goes outside to ride, walk, drive, and play...so, a foretelling of the upcoming months. Went to l1 last night and had a wonderful time with some of her friends who knew her mom...lovely couple and funny too. "Girls want to have more fun" re my photo.

Guess What?

Can you tell I just moved to Portland...everyone has hair,fur,barely hair,dreadlocks, lots of hair....all different color..no I am not planning on that---right now anyway. for real..nite nite...what fun this was. (pix from posiegetscozy site)