Boarding School Ladies

Between "I WANT TO GO" to "ok it is fine not to"

i tried to go to the gay pride events today...i walked about 2 blocks but it was too cold and in my mind i kept saying "what do you really want to do?"--go home and basically nest ALL DAY AND BE BY MYSELF...so that's what i did...too many people yesterday and friday...just too tired and need time for c. learning how to say "no" is still something I am trying to learn and PRACTICE...and listen to what i really want to do...my internal charchar....listen c. --so guess who the graduation picture is? yep landc--cute picture if you ask me.

that time of year

PSU double graduation day plus attending a native high school academy graduation last night...c spoke and sang to the students; it made me cry..and today at the PSU graduation in the morning the speaker made me cry...the smaller MSW graduation in the afternoon did not make me cry...I was too hot and tired...went home and cried...so two full days of crying....oh well...happy graduation to everyone....

What a Week!

Only two days into the week but it feels like 2 months; so much energy toward 

"other"; it is so hard for me to balance my own needs and wants and this high stress job. My weight gain is directly related to this reality...for sure. My foot is not hurting as badily as before; maybe it is healing...so start to slowly walk again...for pleasure not work. Grades will be turned in on Tuesday so that will help a lot...then to think about summer stuff and be more gentle with my own needs...yes, C it is you and you have needs too; you give so much to others...balance and more balance....nite nite

One YEAR

Yep--hard to believe...one year as of 6/6/09--also the last day I have to teach my class for this year....it went very well---it was a bright spot in my week that is for sure...after last t...uck. So, they gave me a beautiful plant who I named "Rose Butterfly" and it made me sneeze the entire afternoon...which was funny....and they gave me a card with so  many sweet statements...all of their words filled me up for sure.  Went home and collapsed. ...then watched several netflix movies...and napped..and watched more netflix...uu in the morning then going to see a play with m. It is 1:00 am I am a getting sleepy...nite...so, being here one year and now into my second year as of one hour. 

June 1st--Happy Birthday Marilyn M

By Marilyn Monroe

"I knew I belonged to the public and to the world, not because I was talented or even beautiful, but because I had never belonged to anything or anyone else. There was my name up in lights. I said, 'God, somebody's made a mistake.' But there it was, in lights. And I sat there and said, 'Remember, you're not a star.' Yet there it was up in lights. I'm going to be a great movie star some day."---------a tiny thought from me---

Thank you Marilyn for giving so much of yourself to everyone else...and not feeling all the love you needed for being human...I love this picture of you---you are smiling and look happy!

TV Stars: NOT--kinda---a little---and a BIG movie star

Aren't we all cute? We were all interviewed by a local native tv station..fun-about 5 minutes in all...a star from "Twilight" is at the farest left. I got his signature for H.

Over a Week---Oh well...welcome back

Photos from a sweet little garden store trip with the n's on Sunday...with a little help from photoshop...I guess I still love purple and pink

Mt Hood--The Long Way

I drove to Mt. Hood via Mt. Hood along the Columbia River---then over to Mt. Hood around the mountain---instead of going straight east on hyway 26...oh well...I saw a lot of the country; wine country too---farms, rivers, bridges, waterfalls, glorious day for a day trip...got home about 3:30ish and watched two movies on netflix then fell asleep...fun day.

Tonight a little photoshop play

These are some pictures I took about a week ago when I went to Astoria; playing with photoshop tonight--went to Mt. Hood (THE MOUNTAIN IN THE EAST)--I think I drove the LONG WAY AROUND THE MOUNTAIN...sure pretty...went to the lodge covered with snow..talk about white privilege...skiers...teenagers...the lodge is dirty and the views are not that great from the lodge--I did not eat there either...expensive and dirty looking...I did enjoy seeing the Mountain up close...walked over a bridge over a river and took some pictures..I could live in this bookstore---I love all the butterflies all over the place...

good bye

short but sweet...did I say funny?

The Sun Is Totally Out Today

It was HOT TODAY ALL DAY....blue skies, blue river, and hot day...wonderful! Went to UU this morning...the sermon was about children and their gifts...so touching..bought a new lawn chair (folding backwards) and sat on my patio over looking the river and Mt. Hood...a time to take a breath and be by myself and rest up!

Pictures in Astoria

Astoria Mini Trip

Went to Astoria today---100 miles both directions; made a big semi square. Cloudy and grey but still nice...traffic was not too bad...just drove slowly and looked at all the trees, trees, farms, shops, and had lunch in Astoria...sweet place. The beginning of their summer Sunday market--bought a bird house.

Desmond Tutu-A Hero for Our Time

What a wonderful lifetime event--to see and hear Desmond Tutu...in Portland at the University of Portland...what a sweet, kind, funny, truthful, elf like, hero for all of us. Went with L1, h, and d.

Spring into Spring Cleaning

what a day makes...my apartment got a GOOD CLEANING....closets, bathroom, living room, desk, kitchen...then a trip to Goodwill...goddess bless them. It feels so much better to have my drawers clean....winter coats and hats put away...even got my hair done...did some school stuff too...but just needed a DAY to be on my own with my own stuff....a bit less now. yea!

One Door Closed but Others Have Opened

This is where I want to go next:

(all of these pictures are from the following site--http://moroccanmaryam.typepad.com/

My Honda Just Had a Major Operation

and I am glad because now it is ready to go and it was preventive work so I don't end up calling in the night if something reallly bad happens....so basically "goodbye" to my tax return. I am grateful I had the money to give it good service and it actually feels better driving it! Way to go, Tune Rite! (recommended by l1)

New Terms in the Northwest

Listening to the news this morning...someone said..."the traffic is pretty hard this morning due to the SUN GLARE"----like in Alaska they have 100 words for ice/snow but here it is words related to rain and new words for sun.

Good Morning SUN

OMG........what a wonderful sunny day---the river is glissing, sparkling, shining...trees have their dresses on now...leaves...omg it is the sun! if you live in Portland you know what this means...and now I do....too.

Funny trash bin on the 7th floor

We Did It--

It is done! I am done! Finished! Over! Gone! Bye! Adios! Later! Take Care!---until the next time but for now---I can rest a bit...had a wonderful day with the n's...UU was tearful...brunch and movie with l,h,d...more tears...now it is raining...more for the crying theme...lots of relief now that it is done and it went sooooooooooo well; had dinner at k last night and tc told stories about corn girl/woman...sweet evening...really enjoyed myself all weekend long.

c in the new building on the 7th floor...looking east; my office will be looking south...from the 7th floor..up up and away.

Day One Done.....yea

I think it was fairly successful...I am so tired, good nite. c

hi

my dear friend b is not feeling --prayers for her

body is hurting

lots of pain today from head to toe...????? rest, CG---anxious and stress re site visit next week. This is the last night for ER---so many memories of this show and other life situations...I don't know what I need or want these days...just doing my thing and feeling overwhelmed with my new position...I have got to find more balance in my life--an ongoing theme in my world...the pix is n in denver...what a beauty she is.

Good Morning

hi--that's all for now.

It is Up to Me Now

Went to the doctor's today...lots going on but I can take some measures to make myself feel better...one step at a time....carpel tunnel in my left wrist...brace for 6 weeks and see how it is responding...plantar fascitis in my right foot...ice packs and rubbing a tennis ball 2 x day...did it already tonight and it feels much better....the body is amazing...

She Has a Southern Accent_that was a surprise

The "She" I am talking about is Heather Armstrong of http://www.dooce.com I sat in the front row (this is typical behavior of an over achieving ex student type); and I laughed and laughed and laughed even more...than I bought her book...how amazing Powell's did what is was tying to do...GET US TO PURCHASE THE BOOK IN SPITE OF ME TELLING MYSELF..YOU WILL NOT BUY THE BOOK...this behavior is similar to how one owes 2 timeshares...oh well...started reading it this morning....after watching a dvd on race for my class on Sat...I need to laugh that's for sure...anyway, l1don't buy the book I will share it with you, ok....it was fun seeing students yesterday...d and n came by then p...8 days until the site visit...who is counting...????? so, back to work now...I just heard a new term "white space" .....yes, it is all around.

a new quarter will be starting---tomorrow

I am so happy that the winter term is over; spring will be good...first the CSWE visit and all that implies....and my new class of SW539==got my income taxes all done...yea! I am planning on walking more each day...I need the stress reduction==time is of the essence..

Change will always happen

It was a pleasant surprise that I did not cry when I was back in Flag---for some reason I thought I would...old stuff that is for sure...I am happy to be back in Portland...saw Mt Hood this evening...what a mountain that is for sure...went on our friendly streetcar downtown and went to Powells and had dinner at the Whole Foods Market---just fun walking around....started on my income taxes earlier in the day and needed a break...then got home and I think I am basically done with them...the majority that is for sure....thank g for turbo taxes software and their easy instructions....my living room looks like a pile of papers and more papers and files...but I am done, at least I think I am....had a nice walk down to Three Degrees and looked at the flowers and seeing all the people starting to come out..it is getting warmer and the day is staying lighter longer...yea for us. This is me in Phx at the Hyatt. I think I like pink!

Return to Portland

I was happy to get back last night...it is cooler here than Phx...cloudy and cool...so refreshing and gentle. I need more softness and peace in my life...too much rushing around and seeing so many people; so I am home...my new home, Portland...s said to me "You came back to us!"--that was sweet...he is so kind and loving. Yes, this is my home and yes, it was nice being in Flag and Phx but again...I have made the transition and happy I am here with my new friends...and my dear friend l1 et al. My apartment is a mess...stuff everywhere---so guess what I will be doing...also, need to work on MY INCOME TAX RETURN. yes oh yes! --I did see stars in Flag...

Phoenix

Had a wonderful time in Flag with my friends! Now in Phx at the conference; so nice a warm and sunny...meeting new people from around the country re future ideas for BSW programs. 

Signing off for a few more days ===

I am here---FLAGSTAFF

kinda a bumpy ride from Phx to Flag but got here about 1:30...Carol was there---went to my favorite Mexican food restuarant--Salsa Brava....drove by my house; no one was there...hopefully I will be able to get in sometime while I am here....the best is that the sky is BLUE AND MORE BLUE. Now it is cloudy but that will change....Carol's new dog is so cute-Elie Mae..."buddy". Really cute markings, brown and soft grey highlights...she is 7 months old. Wonderful to be "home" ...my home....my previous home...and the parking is free! lots of free parking....ha ha 

last day before I travel to Flag

Yea-------going to Flag in the morning...can't wait....sure will be nice to see my buddies....and see the mountain. L1--have a great day at your event tomorrow...I will be thinking of you, --sure proud of you! Thanks for all that you do for our social work profession and teaching. C

Now that the report is done: a cold is coming on

darn...snezzing, ....tired....sure hope it leaves quickly so I will not be sick for Flag.; lots done this afternoon at least; my class for spring and the one I "accidently" got due to some other reasons; UU was very different; we basically mediated for 45 minutes to dvd of the ocean and falling icebergs...guess you had to be there...then went to lunch with some new friends I am making there; a sweet older man and his wife...and t a new male friend. so just being me....then i went to find a place to make keys...no such luck....so i am still on the hunt! watched a netflix movie "November Moon"; a was story in France with great acting.

Starting to Feel Again...

the report will be printed in the morning so it will be GONE...over with for now anyway...starting to really think about being in az again...almost one year...my self esteem is really down due to my weight gain...oh well...accept my self and see my friends....my very dear friends from so many years...saw a video of a dog sleeping and almost fell off my chair with l1 earlier in the day...I have watched it several  times today...just need to laugh out loud and I did. I am really feeling the pressure getting less...so, now to open my mail and relax. 

It is March

Yea it is March....it is sunny today at least right now...done with the mass majority of the benchmark II report...so now I can start to have a more regular life...like getting ready to go to ARIZONA! I got this pix from ali's sister who lives in charlotte, nc.

An Adopted Pet via the internet

I just adore this dog---she is owned by Posie gets cozy---I love her so much...so I have decided to "adopt her off the net to look at" ---don't fear I will not go get her...just so sweet...

Just Too Much

Thank g this week is over....search committee, accrediation report, faculty meetings, classes, advising, and meetings and more meetings...just toooooooooooo much..........so I am basically really tired today--can see mt hood so that gives me some spiritual energy. three people were in touch with me from wyeast last week...that feels good that I have a beginning community there...playing with my iphone re new applications---watched two movies via netflix last night....sure happy I have that resource to get my mind off stuff....

Just Playing

Just Working on the Accrediation Report

Just too busy working on the accrediation benchmark II report; went to First Unitary Church today and heard the ex president of UU and Amensity International...one of the most significant sermons on justice I have ever heard...it was outstanding; went with l1. Watched the stars get their awards (Academy Awards) tonight at l1 house and had dinner over there...so sweet; just love them. Slumdog won almost everything. So just writing and more writing. Went for a nice long walk yesterday with o + c and their two cute dogs. My life will return to some "normal" after this report is sent in!

"Big Sue"-Read comment

The most expensive picture...see note following--"Big Sue"

From: ARtblog----Lucian Freud has become the most expensive living artist at auction with his "Big Sue" painting. The large naked woman painted on a couch is called "Benefits Supervisor Sleeping" and sold for $33.6m or £17.2m at Christies last week. The sitter is Sue Tilley and she sat for Freud over a four year period.I'm so glad that a painterly painter now holds the title of the most expensive living artist at auction. Big shiny hearts and pill cabinets might be interesting but how can they compare to a painting by a living master?! Of course I'm biased as I'm a painter too, but who isn't biased?The London based Russian oil billionaire Roman Abramovich is said to be the buyer of Lucian Freud's Big Sue and Francis Bacon's triptych (which sold for $86.3 million or £43 million)>> Lucian Freud News, Art Collecting, Art Auctions

Tues--post already

I tried to write a blog on Tuesday but it is now midnight and it is tomorrow..oh well....

Monday: Let It Be

Let go and let goddess...balance....

A New Leaf or A New Tree or New Mole???

New Software in the Hands of a Minor

Least We Forget: Ode to Valentine Day Goodness

Must I say more? I really don't think so.................of course the lady muse behind all of this is my dearest friend, l....

Becoming a Member at Wy'east UU Fellowship: A Time to Belong

It was wonderful to become a member of Wy'east UU this morning with l,d,h present. Making many new friends and hearing about people's lives that are so different than my own; gets me out of myself....went west on 26th this afternoon and shopped at Best Buy and bought Photoshop Elements 7 for my photos and play...I have to get some play and fun into my life and not just work....I need more balance...This is a picture I took early fall when I just started at PSU at an administrative retreat afterwards we went to Canon Beach...photoshoped! playing around--love the blue colors and contrast with the darkness

It is a New Day

A series of pictures over the last few days-from death to growth to flowers! Yep...the cycle of life---now it is raining!

I am glad it is Sat...HVD

As I have told many people this past week; I am glad I am still standing...it was the hardest week in my total professional career as an educator and social worker...the Talking Circle with cp was the blessing for all of us...grace and love in motion. lots of love and hugs from my friends and charchar was having quite a time with all of her feelings...up, down, and around! a new day has come...literally, it is Sat! good nite charchar...sleep well....and sleep more...and enjoy your walk..into new beauty...remember what everyone has said to you...surround a with love too. it is a new day....listen to sting sing that song!

The Moon is Beautiful Tonight

I love the moon, la luna.--it is white, totally full, surrounded by clouds but visible. I adore the moon...so peaceful...it is night too; I am glad it will be tomorrow really soon.

Crises Week--go forward

danger and opportunity: crises but crises means an opening from all sides for change....talked about my mother to d tonight; she is here--within me today...totally happy this week is over...some resolution later. nicked my middle finger last night---ouch! pay attention to your boby CG

One Minute At a Time

Peace and calm....thanks to all of u who helped me today. C

New Membership at UU

Became a member of Wy'east yesterday...with dancing and new friendships. Don was there and witnessed my signing "the book". Saw "Slumdog..." yesterday afternoon...loved it. Hard stuff happening at work today and the end of last week.